I was once very nervous and timid to deliver any talks.For a daily presentation , even just reading the script in my hands was challenging for me .Thus, I could only admire those glib talkers on the stage , shining with their pearlescent radiance.
When I was doing my Junior high,I was surprisingly sent on a task to be the representative of all the volunteers of our school to speak out in front of all the teachers and students in the school at one morning assembly.I tried my best to persuade and push myself to take this challenge even though how eagerly I did not want to make fun of myself in front of the whole school.Following the school instructions ,I drafted a speech script and revised numerous times with the aids of my parents and teachers.More crucially ,I did rehearsals repeatedly in front of different groups of people.Each time ,I asked for their advice for improvements.Besides,I was also grateful for their encouragement. During the whole precess,it was quite surprising to me that I could control myself to stay calm other than feeling nervous ,meanwhile,getting myself into the contents as well as the emotions I wanted to express.
Finally,the result came out to be a pleasant one on that day.I received a lot of positive feedback regarding my performance as well as the appreciation towards the efforts paid by us volunteers.
This experience teaches me whenever we encounter with any challenges,the biggest obstacle we should overcome is surmounting ourselves.Otherwise,with this most threatening enemy ,we would never be able to move forward.
Not surprisingly,I became more confident after this experience.As a result,I am now more willing to challenge myself!(308 words)
When I was doing my Junior high,I was surprisingly sent on a task to be the representative of all the volunteers of our school to speak out in front of all the teachers and students in the school at one morning assembly.I tried my best to persuade and push myself to take this challenge even though how eagerly I did not want to make fun of myself in front of the whole school.Following the school instructions ,I drafted a speech script and revised numerous times with the aids of my parents and teachers.More crucially ,I did rehearsals repeatedly in front of different groups of people.Each time ,I asked for their advice for improvements.Besides,I was also grateful for their encouragement. During the whole precess,it was quite surprising to me that I could control myself to stay calm other than feeling nervous ,meanwhile,getting myself into the contents as well as the emotions I wanted to express.
Finally,the result came out to be a pleasant one on that day.I received a lot of positive feedback regarding my performance as well as the appreciation towards the efforts paid by us volunteers.
This experience teaches me whenever we encounter with any challenges,the biggest obstacle we should overcome is surmounting ourselves.Otherwise,with this most threatening enemy ,we would never be able to move forward.
Not surprisingly,I became more confident after this experience.As a result,I am now more willing to challenge myself!(308 words)
Hi Yuwei
回复删除Thank you for sharing this personal account of yours. As someone who has been through something similar, I can empathize with your feelings of fear and self-doubt. But despite so, you managed to push through these obstacles and not let your nerves get the best of you. Well done!
However I do think that more heed can be paid to your use of punctuation and connectors. For instance in the first line of the second paragraph, it would be good to put a full-stop after "... deliver any talks" while at the same time, re-ordering the next sentence like so "For a daily presentation, even just reading off the script in my hands was challenging." Another example within the same paragraph would be how the sentence "Besides, I was also grateful for their encouragement" sounds fragmented and would thus be better suited to be connected to the previous sentence. The last sentence of the last paragraph also requires some minor tweaks. Perhaps "Not surprisingly, I became more confident after this experience. As a result, I am now more willing to challenge myself." sounds better?
In any case, this reflection is well-crafted in that your train of thought is logical and easy to follow. It is an enjoyable read and I do hope that your confidence as a speaker will continue to grow. (:
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Cheers, Sabrina
Thanks very much for sharing this well focused and descriptive post, Yuwei. The subtitle for this could easily be "practice makes perfect" as your effort at rehearsing and getting feedback from friends undoubtedly impacted your eventual delivery. It's great that your confidence was boosted by your experience.
回复删除You've also engaged your readers well. Sabrina can relate to the experience and she provides good advice on your language use. Again, I wonder about the paragraphing as well, though I know you mentioned that you were having problems in writing the post.
In any case, this is a well written reflection, Yuwei.